9 Reasons I'm Thankful for My Wife on Our 9th Anniversary

I married way out of my league and I know it. Lindsey is my best friend, confidant, and the greatest blessing God has ever given to me in my life. Here are just a few of the reasons why. 

1. She believes in grace.

When I make mistakes, which is often, Lindsey believes in grace. She believes in it in the tangibly difficult moments just as much as she does in the easy moments. I can't tell you how many times my voice has come crawling through the telephone lines or through the thick, tension wrought air I've brought in from a bad moment and her grace has burst through to bring life giving grace and hope. She believes that our marriage is for forever and that so is God's grace to us all.

2. She works hard so that I can work hard.

My wife chose to put aside her college degree in order to take care of our home and our children. Because she does so well in the home, I have been able to focus on my schoolwork and education, as well as ministry at our church. There are some wives who are so terribly needy that their husband can barely focus on what he needs to do. Lindsey strives to let me work in relative peace and quiet. Working from home and on the same floor as the children makes this an large task and constant challenge, but she excels at it.

3. Lindsey puts others ahead of herself.

I have often seen Lindsey get a bit of extra money from a sale, couponing, or budgeting and turn around and use the money on others. It wasn't too far into our marriage that I learned that I cannot give Lindsey gift cards or cash, because she will often use those things on gifts for the kids and I or others. Her love for others is evident in the way she sacrificially gives away what she wants (even at times her own dreams) so others can have what they need.

4. She is a constant source of encouragement

Lindsey knows exactly how to encourage me. Along the course of our marriage, we have lived in privilege and traveled internationally with fine dining and we've struggled to pay the light bill and ate ramen noodles. We've experienced harsh disappointments, but my beloved has never left my side or ceased to encourage me. She believes in me and constantly lets me know it. I don't just think, I know, that i would not be the man I am today or where I am if not for the love and support of my wife.

5. She's not a princess, she's a queen.

When we first got married, I called Lindsey a princess and was quickly chastised for it. Princesses are damsels in distress who rarely get their hands dirty. They are often spoiled and rarely contribute. She didn't want to be a damsel in distress. She was a daughter of a King, but she wanted to love and support someone in their reign over our own castle. She wanted to be a queen. She is my warrior queen, fighting alongside me for our marriage, our family, and for the great Gospel of Jesus Christ to go out. She carries herself cautiously and regally, lovingly exalting those around her, yet maintaining grace and poise. She doesn't demand for herself, but thinks of others. It is often I find her burdened and thinking to pray for one soul or another. Her own comfort is often thrown aside for the good of the children and she doesn't talk about fairness.

6. She is beautiful and doesn't know it.

In a culture obsessed with waist-size, photoshopped realities, and six pack abs, classic beauty has been thrown out in favor of shifting perceptions of  what is beautiful. Lindsey looks in the mirror, magazines, and stores and sees what she thinks the world sees. But if she could see what I see, she'd take down the mirrors. She's strikingly and stunningly beautiful. Just ask her, I can't walk by her without stealing a kiss or an embrace. She's amazing and she doesn't even see it, which is a real shame, because I can't stop staring. She's a beauty in every way, inside and out and my love for her grows daily. 

7. She's lived on her own

Lindsey lived in Lille, France for 9 months before we were married. She's been the one making choices, waking herself up for her responsibilities, discovering a new culture, and becoming immersed in a land/culture/language unknown to her. Honestly, this made marrying her all the easier. It meant that this angelic beauty could walk into a bachelor's world and learn to navigate a man-child's heart as we became one. It meant that as I was still discerning God's calling on my heart, would be able to walk head-held high with me, knowing that we'd adapt as we went. She's fiercely independent and tremendously loyal. She needs nothing but her God, yet chooses to be with all her call her family and friend.   

8. Lindsey is creative (the understatement of the year)

Lindsey is the Macgyver of crafting. when we were first married, before children, she would craft for hours, spinning golden treasures from trinkets and thread. Once kids came along, her focus shifted, but the creativity and crafting did not cease. Where her focus had once been jewelry, her focus became more children specific or items to adorn a home. As our budget for crafting dramatically decreased, Lindsey's creativity increased. She would find "treasure" at the city dump, Goodwill, yard sales, or on the side of the road, and with hours of lost sleep amidst the draws of 3 children, she would find time to turn these items into the things that people admire so much about our home. Lindsey's creativity has made so many houses turn into homes, and she uses that ability and vision to bless our family and others as well.

9. Lindsey has prioritized the kingdom of God over her personal comfort.

9 years ago, when we said our vows, Lindsey told me, quoting Ruth: Where you go I will go, and where you lodge I will lodge. Your people will be my people, and your God my God.

Lindsey meant those words then and still means them now. We have lived in 1 apartment, 4 houses, and 4 cities in 9 years. We've talked at great length about her hopes and dreams. Where she'd like to live, what her ideal house would look like. Accumulating wealth and establishing comfort has never been a top priority for her. Instead, she cares much more deeply about relationships and about God’s kingdom than her own comfort. People are more important than things to her, and I respect that about her, even when asking her to move to places not her choosing to love and invest in people she has never met. Her desire to obey God outweighs her desire for comfort, in all of the forms it presents itself in our world. She's a-maz-ing.

I won't say I couldn't be more thankful, because I'm sure I miss more than I see, but these past nine years have been the best of my life. I love you and look forward to what God has in store for us down the road. Happy anniversary, Lindsey!